During my trials and tribulations of trying to conceive people have said very insensitive, mean, ignorant things, these are my top ten with comments that came into my head, but I used the filter not to respond:
10. Why else do you get married but to have children?
Really, I thought I got married to spend the rest of my life with T. If I remember my wedding day correctly, I only pledged to be openned to the idea of children.
9. You are young, you've got time.
Why does every doctor I see say this? It is frustrating. Yes, I am only 30. In fertility terms I have time, however if I started this journey at 28, and as time goes by it will only be more difficult. Wouldn't it be smarter to take action NOW?
8. Relax, it'll happen.
Relaxing is NOT going to get me to ovulate or get my testosterone to a "normal" range is it?
7. Aren't you overeacting? You don't have a problem. It is all in your head.
Denial, is not just a river in Egypt Mom. Just because you choose to ignore an issue, doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Actually, that is a double negative, therefore it means that it DOES exist.
6. Are you sure your getting the right hole?
Is that what happened with you?
5. Your whole existence should be to give me a grandchild.
You need to reevaluate that idea, because it may never happen.
4. Your just like my granddaughter, much too selfish to have children.
I'll remember that at your next birthday.
3. You know that you shouldn't douche after you have sex if you are trying to conceive?
You really think I am stupid. Stupidity doesn't preclude a person from being a parent, actually sometimes I think it is a requirement. And, since I'm not that stupid, that might be my problem.
2. Maybe you aren't meant to have kids.
Thanks, but since you aren't God, I'd like a second opinion.
1. You better get going on having a kid, before T leaves you.
I think you should be more concerned with your husband my dear. Especially, as a manager of a grocery store he has more emergencies than my husband who is a police officer.
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3 comments:
Please tell me you don't talk to these wackos anymore!!! I, too, have gotten "are you using the right hole?". Those comments made me mad. I got told from two different people some good ones just today... I was actually going to post a blog on it! weird...
1. Good things will happen eventually!
2. It will happen when you are ready.
Grrrrr!! Our babies need to stop playing and come join us!!
Good Lord!!! Some people suck. (OK, a lot of people suck when you're dealing with IF.) I also get upset by the "you're still young" comment. I'll be 30 in 6 months, and we've been TTC for more than 2 years. Do people actually think I want to spend years and years doing this? Egg quality doesn't improve from here on out!
Since our problem is mostly male-factor, and D. is very open about it, I've heard the "Let me know if you need any help" (wink wink, nudge nudge) comment more than a few times. From his brother-in-law, no less. Ick.
Sorry, I'm a little late on this. I hate the "you're still young" comment and I'm also with Ellen on the "Let me know if you need any help." I've gotten that from 2 men that actually went through IF.
The craziest one I've gotten though and it just left me so dumb-founded was, "Patience is a virtue," This was said to me by an EAVES DROPPING 16 YEAR OLD!!
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